familiar.

havent slept since yesterday. tired but not.

a little bit blurred with my schedule all along.

actually forgot what i wanted to blog about.. but in the end the familiar thought caught me back again. anyway, fine i gotta admit that my life has been more on the downside since idk when. what made me kinda look forward growing up is the goal that dream that i want to do in the future. haha and many of you all might not know but i wanna be a star, not literally mariah carey star but just maybe someone involved in the media industry. i wanna be who i am and share it with the world that kinda thing, but now, that dream seem to fade as i grow. it starts to shift into the unreachable category.

maybe its a low confident, low self esteem kinda thing, but i just feel that i cant make it since im more "exposed" now. and maybe cause i fear the people who seem they can make it out in life better than i do. Some would say, just stick to your dream, if you believe in yourself thats what matters. but now , even believing for me is starting to turn into a doubt.

life just makes me wanna deal with it one at a time, instead of creating some illusion that people telll me that i should focus on achieving that goal whatsoever.

it has reach a stage where me myself, got lost somehow, and just cant be bothered to find my way back.

is that how i should feel?

goodbye.